Saturday, July 11, 2009

Yo mama so poor jokes


This here is about all the poor mama's out there. Of course these are just jokes!


Yo mama so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said "Moving.
"Yo mama so poor she can't afford to pay attention!
Yo mama so poor when I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush!
Yo mama so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers!
Yo mama so poor when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!"
Yo mama so poor she went to McDonald's and put a milkshake on layaway.
Yo mama so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk.
Yo mama so poor her face is on the front of a foodstamp.
Yo mama so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya doin'?" She said, "Buying luggage.
"Yo mama so poor she drives a peanut.
Yo mama so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Yo mama so ugly Jokez

Hey guys this is a tribute to all the ugly mama's out there Enjoy!


Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals.


"Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.


Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it.


"Yo mama so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.


Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower


Yo mama so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.


Yo mama so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck


Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.


Yo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras


Yo mama so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her


Yo mama so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.


Yo mama so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say "Wow, is it Halloween already?"


Yo mama so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.


Yo mama so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.


Yo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.


Yo mama so ugly she made an onion cry.


Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower!


Yo mama so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours. . .for a quote!


Yo mama so ugly they put her in dough and made monster cookies!


Yo mama so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out!


Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and gets arrested!


Yo mama so ugly even Rice Krispies won't talk to her!


Yo mama so ugly Ted Dansen wouldn't date her!


Yo mama so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone!


Yo mama so ugly she turned Medusa to stone!


Yo mama so ugly The NHL banned her for life


Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween!


Yo mama so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday!


Yo mama so ugly if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects!


Yo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints


Yo mama so ugly she made an onion cry!Yo mama so ugly people go as her for Halloween.


Yo mama so ugly that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her.


Yo mama so ugly she scares the roaches away.


Yo mama so ugly we have to tie a steak around your neck so the dog will play with her!


Yo mama so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.


Yo mama so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.


Yo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Post your Yo Mama Jokez here

Yo mama Jokez of the day Enjoy!


This is a picture that represents all the moms we make fun of today
Look at that fatty!
Here are all the good Yo mama so fat jokes I got
Your mom's so fat she can't even jump to a conclusion.
Your mom's so fat, when she dances the band skips.
Your mom's so fat, I have to take a bus a train and a cab just to get on her good side.
Your mother's so fat, her clothes have stretch marks.
Your mother's so fat, she needs a watch on both arms because she covers two time zones.
Your mother's so fat, you could slap her butt and ride the waves.
Your mother's so fat, she needs a hula hoop to keep her socks up.
Your mother's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate.
Your mother's so fat, when they used her underwear for bungee jumping, they hit the ground.
Your mother's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant she looks at the menu and says, "OK"!
Your mom's so fat, when she lays on the beach, people run around yelling, "Free Willie!"
Your mom's so big, she plays marbles with planets.
Your mom's so fat, her belt size is the equator.
Your mom's so fat, she has to buy two airplane tickets.
Your mom's so fat, when she turns around they throw her a welcome back party.
Your mom's so fat she uses a satellite dish as a diaphragm.
Your mom's so fat when she took her dress to the cleaners they told her, "Sorry, we don't do curtains."
Your mom's so fat, the back of her neck looks like a pack of franks.
Your mom's so fat, she sat on four quarters and made a dollar.
Your mom's so big, when the family wants to watch home movies they ask her to wear white.
Your mothers so fat, she was baptized at Sea World.
Your mothers so fat, people jog around her for exercise.
Your mothers so fat, she went to the movies and sat next to everyone.
Your mothers so fat, she's on a light diet...as soon as it gets light out she starts eating.
Your mothers so big that she sat on a rainbow and got Skittles.
Your mothers so fat that when she wore an "X" jacket a helicopter tried to land on her back.
Your mothers head is so big, it shows up on radar.
Your mothers so fat, when she went to the beach, she was the only one that got a tan.
Your mothers so fat your bath tub has stretch marks.
Your mothers so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, "To be continued."
Your mothers so fat, she got a run in her jeans.
Your mothers so fat, she irons her clothes on the driveway.
Your mothers so fat, she sells shade in the summer.
Your mothers so fat, she left the house with high-heels and came back with flip-flops.
Your mothers so fat, when I got on top of her my ears popped.
Your mothers so fat, she influences the tides.
Your mothers so fat, when she fell over, she rocked herself to sleep trying to get up again.
Your mothers so fat, she was baptized at Marine World.
Your mothers so fat, she has her own area code.
Your mothers so fat, they got her face on the Crisco can.
Your mothers so fat, she stepped on a scale and it said "Sorry, we don't do live stock."
Yo mama so fat, were in her right now.
Yo mama so ugly, her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.
Yo mama so ugly, when she walks down the street in September, people say "Damn, is it Halloween already?"
Yo mama so fat, every time someone say "Kool Aid" she bust through the wall.
Yo mama so fat, her legs are like spoiled milk - white & chunky!
Yo mama so fat, you have to roll her in flour and look for the wet spot to fuck her
Yo mama so fat, she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller
Yo mama so fat, she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!
Yo mama so nasty, I called her for phone sex and she gave me an ear infection.
Yo mama so ugly, she went into an hunted house and came out with an application
Yo mama so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."
Yo mama so ugly, her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her
Yo mama so ugly, the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
Yo mama so ugly, that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.
Yo mama so ugly, when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours... for a quote!
Yo mama so fat, her nickname is "DAMN"
Yo mama so fat, that she needs a sock for each toe
Yo mama so fat, she eats Wheat Thicks.
Yo mama so slutty, she could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch ball!
Yo mama so slutty, she could suck a golf ball through six feet of garden hose
Yo mama so poor, her face is on the front of a food stamp.
Yo mama's like a refrigerator, everyone sticks their meat in her.
Yo momma is like a bowling ball she gets three fingers, thrown in the gutter, and comes back for more.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Yo Mama Jokez

Yo mama's so clumsy she got tangled up in a cordless phone!

Yo mama's arms are so short, she has to tilt her head to scratch her ear!

Yo mama's mouth so big, she speaks in surround sound!

Yo mama's teeth are so yellow she spits butter!

Yo mama's so skinny she turned sideways and disappeared!

Yo mama's so short she does backflips under the bed!

Yo mama's so short you can see her feet on her drivers licence!

Yo mama's so poor she can't afford to pay attention!

Yo mama's so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed!

Yo mama's so greasy companies buy their Oil from her!

Yo mama's so flat she's jealous of the wall!

Yo mama's so poor she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken to lick other people's fingers!

Yo mama's so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning!

Yo mama's so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs!

Yo mama's so bald you can see whats on her mind!